Things to do at 60 and the good news about being old
Another one bites the dust
GDC made it to the ripe old age of sixty so have updated the list for him.
The Good News about reaching 60 is.....
Kidnappers are not going to be very interested in you.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
No one expects you to run into a burning building.
People will call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?'
People will no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
There is nothing left to learn the hard way!
Things you buy now will never wear out.
You can eat your dinner at 4 P.M.
You will now really enjoy hearing about other people’s operations.
You can have a party and the neighbours won't even realise it.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
You can sing along with Muzac.
Your eyes won't get much worse.
Your joints have now become more accurate forecasters than the met office
Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
You won’t even hear irritating noises!
Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
GDC made it to the ripe old age of sixty so have updated the list for him.
Things you need to do at 60 ......
Claim your winter fuel allowance
Claim your winter fuel allowance
Get your bus pass as soon as possible
Use National Express – half price travel
Sign up for ‘Aid – Call’
Get a free eye test
Move to Scotland or Wales and get a free dental check-up
Take advantage of free chiropody
Buy a senior railcard? £26 gets 33% off.
Get free prescription drugs for all your ailments
Claim English Heritage discount
Claim National Trust discount
Try cross-country skiing – but start with a small country!
Use National Express – half price travel
Sign up for ‘Aid – Call’
Get a free eye test
Move to Scotland or Wales and get a free dental check-up
Take advantage of free chiropody
Buy a senior railcard? £26 gets 33% off.
Get free prescription drugs for all your ailments
Claim English Heritage discount
Claim National Trust discount
Try cross-country skiing – but start with a small country!
Get your B & Q Diamond Card – discounts on a Wednesday
Get your Focus DIY privilege card and get 10% off every day
Get 10% off Boots own brand goods with an Advantage Card
Claim senior discount on your Olympics tickets, just a dream this one!
Take more exercise - you will die healthier
The Good News about reaching 60 is.....
Kidnappers are not going to be very interested in you.
In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
No one expects you to run into a burning building.
People will call at 9 PM and ask, 'Did I wake you?'
People will no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
There is nothing left to learn the hard way!
Things you buy now will never wear out.
You can eat your dinner at 4 P.M.
You will now really enjoy hearing about other people’s operations.
You can have a party and the neighbours won't even realise it.
You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
You can sing along with Muzac.
Your eyes won't get much worse.
Your joints have now become more accurate forecasters than the met office
Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
You won’t even hear irritating noises!
Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
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