The joys of low cost travel

Ryanair gets a lot of bad press but has a lot of positives, particularly low prices and good punctuality. Unfortunately, low flight prices can mean awkward timings, a small baggage allowance and operators of car parks don’t share Mr O’Leary’s business strategy.
On this trip, which cost £12 return, we had an early flight time of 06:30 so getting to Stansted by public transport was not an option.
Parking in long term for a month was too expensive at around £200. Taxi to Stansted and back is around £170 so not good either.
What about a Hotel? TW found a hotel with overnight stay for £115 and only 10 mins. from the terminal. Transfer was included, secure parking, wouldn’t have to give up the car keys. Get in there! - Whitehall Hotel here we come.
Now, the trusty VW has SAT NAV so we did not bother with getting directions – big mistake! Unfortunately the German designers of the Satellite Navigation system forsook the normal Teutonic principles of over-detail and over-engineering and decided that abbreviating the Post Code is good enough for the UK. So we put in what we could of the Post Code and found Church End and headed off, wrong Church End! Several phone calls to the hotel, asking people walking their dogs, a change of drivers – an ‘if you think you can find it you bloomin drive’ moment and we were there. I was beginning to think the place didn’t exist or was like the Scottish village in Brigadoon that appears one day every 100 years. It took 60 mins from Stansted to find the Hotel. An hour of Essex country roads, quite pretty actually - if you are in the right humour. Our 500 year old Hotel was deemed to be off-road by the SAT NAV and the village of Broxted didn’t exist even though it had a 12th century church.
Anyway, the hotel wasn’t bad and we decided we deserved dinner which was fine. Next morning, up bright and early for the short (included) Taxi transfer at 10 minutes to 5.
One of the Ryanair restriction is on baggage. To avoid paying extra we take only 10Kg of hand luggage each. So it’s a case of wear it or pocket it. So Michelin man and wife in thermal insulation and walking boots, our pockets stuffed with mobile phones and anything heavy, hit the taxi.
Phew, its a bit warm isn’t it!
Now there are two extremes of Taxi drivers. At one extreme you get the friendly chap who keeps turning round all the time, doesn’t watch the road much, wants to talk about last night’s match, about his family, politics - anything really. At the other extreme is the Flying Fin! Eyes are fixed firmly on the road, driving gloves are on. You guessed it we got the rally driver.
Phew its very warm isn’t! Take the jackets off, aargh the windows won’t open! I am going to die. What’s Polish for slow up and turn the heating down? It took just 6 mins to get from the Hotel to the Stansted Terminal. It really was hell on wheels.
Thank God he didn’t have a German Sat Nav!

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